Archive for the ‘insane’ Category

Curse

Posted: June 20, 2013 in beloved, deep notions, insane

Did I need to say beyond
Did I need to be a bigger man
Did I not be me
Lets first introduce We
Now abruptly me
Cursed I be
Curse I without We

Unsaid words.

Posted: March 22, 2013 in beloved, helpless, insane, Romance

Words are thoughts in action
Some you said some i wish i had

Words make sense
Some you said some i wish left unsaid

Words create doubt
Some you said some i wish hadn’t heard

Words dissolve emotions
Some you said some i wish would have said

Words destroy
Some you said some i wish……..

Moon strings

Posted: February 9, 2013 in beloved, insane, Romance

When She sings
Makes me realise i am a humanbeing

When She smiles
Even the dark side of Moon Shines

When she stares
This heart beats with a kiddish joy

When she holds
This world becomes all i had thought

When she kisses
Gods in heaven feel the Jealous cheeks

When she goodbyes
I feel the sorrowful music of Moon strings

Why

Posted: September 8, 2012 in deep notions, helpless, insane, thoughts

We had a life ahead of us
You said you dreamed it too
We were to be one

You chose to run
I dont blame you
But i hate you for what you have done

Everyone has ideas
We had ours to make a life
Dreamland we were to create

You made a wrong choice
God knows i still love you
Now i curse the day we met

You were to share and stay
Dismised you all that i made
Tried really tried to have it glued
But
Left i am now with only a Why

Failed

Posted: July 24, 2012 in insane, Romance, Uncategorized

I left everything behind
You dint even try to mend
I created all new
Built up walls to block the past

Time i even bend
You failed to understand
Caged my rage
Disloged pain from your gaze

Truly i made a change
You lived as if it was a revenge
Trust was broken
I glued it all but it caved in

Imprisoned myself
You just took advantage
Pretended to believe
I stayed but you wanted me to fail.

You…

Posted: July 17, 2012 in deep notions, helpless, insane

You brought happiness
I hadnt asked for it
You made me a man
I dint wana growup
You made me a house
I wanted to travel
You made me prove
I dint even know myself
You opened the gates
I had never even lockedup

You made me mad
I hadnt even understood
You made me choose
I hadnt known what i wanted
You made me create
I dint even know my wants
You made me Me
now i dont even know who it is

Light in the dark

Posted: June 27, 2012 in insane, thoughts

image

When someones mind starts to live in its fears that right there is the darkest hour for that person. Everyone is in genral able to survive cause we know how to control our fears but someone whose mind constantly reminds it of the very things that causes fear then you have a problem. Sanity and Not is just divided by a thin and fragile line upon which our fears reside. We bend and twist around this line everyday with ease. Fears are unique to each and everyone, loss of loved one, physical harm or death itself and then a few thousand materilstic fears survive in our heads. Yet we each day knowingly put ourselves at risk and under pressure. The dark has its own appeal and everyone survives having to not give into it. We choose to see the light no matter how faint or frail and live without fears. To give into or to rid one of these fears has the same strength of outcome but opposite the values of normal human behaviours. Darkest fears are needed for the light to be seen as light is seen better through the dark.

We cant know everything, actually we will never know nothing.
And to know that we cant know everything is wisdom (leo tolstoy)
The only thing we can know is what we want. A child wants to grow and have fun it doesnt understand good or bad it just knows what it wants and what makes it smile.
A sadhu wants to attain inner peace to be one with this world, which i think means death without leaving bad memories or noncompleted deeds.
Rest of us want a lot but mostly all want love.
I dont really understand how can one reach higher state of consiousness when the seeker is wanting it in the first place. If someone doesnt want anything i mean nothing not even inner peace or whatever that is, would truly be free. We all are bound by our wants and needs nothing wrong cause we are animals after all.
i want to know everything that there can be known but thats unachievable and i am sure you agree, if thats true than i cant achieve the higher state for if i dont know what all surrounds me and affects me how am i to rid myself of it.
Personaly i believe the ones we call crazy or mad are the people who have understood more than us normal people and hence they have lost it or got to the higher state.
The most controversial thing is… hindu vedas start with a simple statement ” jagath mithya” meaning everything is an illusion and hence all that we know is false. Like the colors we see actually dont exist they are just given colors by our brain for different shades of black to make it easier for us to differentiate. If it all starts by being false by the color itself then rest is self explanatory.
I am not saying to find the higher state and stuff is wrong or hokus.pokus but that we need to have a control on our wants or to get to state of peace we need to not want anything not even want inner peace, but thats never gona happen you see. So one should achieve all that one wants and then you might truly achieve an unwanting stage and be at peace…but then again that will never happen we humans keep wanting more and more.
Then my or anyone elses chase to keep getting at our wants is the journey to getting to inner peace like a meditators meditation is to his.
What our are wants, they ae desires for money, materials and to be loved, so we are seeking things to have all this stuff but for whom for the ones we love and to get love in return. Love drives us all, so if i get the ideal love have i achieved nirvana… If thats sounds true what are these sadhus, monks etc..looking for in solitude for in their state of solace they are with no one, then maybe to rid ones self of all forms of love is to get the ultimate inner peace… But what if one falls in love with the idea of solitude then again you are wanting something and the whole journey to higher state is wasted.
In this whole argument all are defeated as either ways we all are wanting something..even love for god or devotion to god is wanting for thy holiness blessings or something.
This wiserskydiver feels to completly love someone without any expectations or questions is to get the higher state.. And that again is unachievable for at some point you gona be wanting to be loved back, but those few moments when you unquestioningly loving someone is yojr higher state, when you are truly happy just being with someone for no reason or wants..that is true nirvana.